Aspiring freelance writer 

Friend or Foe of Yellow

I believe that the color yellow is the most controversial of all the colors. The color that can either mean happiness or bad luck. Yellow is associated with the sun, fresh flowers and summertime. It reminds people of vacation season, swimming, adventures and just feeling alive. Yet some people hate it, think it’s a color of bad luck, it’s “too bright” or the sun makes it miserably hot outside.

Personally, I’m team Switzerland; I neither love nor hate the color, but it does remind me of sadness, uncertainty, unbearable loneliness. You see, the color yellow and I, we go back years together. It reminds me of where I came from and who I am, but it also forces me to remember every single traumatic detail of how much hurt a human being can possibly bear.

The big, yellow walls were splitting and cracking from trying to hold in so much deceit, and way too many lies to count. From the outside, you’d see love, loyalty, and wholesomeness. On the inside, it was a different story. Inside, there was a whole new set of rules, and God forbid if you ever fucked up. One day, I hope to never see the yellow again, but if I do, I hope it’s in the happiest of memories.


I DID NOT edit before posting. My reason being is, I have been out of the hobby of writing for quite some time. I used to spend hours and hours writing all kinds of different short stories and all kinds of descriptive things that I was so proud of. I am slowly getting back into it now that I can focus my thoughts better than I have been able to for quite awhile, honestly.

Anyway, I’m taking baby steps back into it, and just started out with what was on my mind, kind of just going with it. After I am a little more comfortable and confident, my goal is to post a variety of topics, longer blog posts and of course, researching when needed. Right now, we are starting off with fun 🙂

Calling All Present and Future Murderinos

Nothing makes my day feel more complete than listening to a mind boggling mysterious murder or some sort of tragic, horrific event caused by nature or an unsolved case that really gets you thinking about what really happens to people, as far as how can one just disappear into thin air. If you’re a fellow true crime junkie such as myself, then you know exactly what I’m talking about, and I say, welcome. My Favorite Murder is a podcast that is available via Amazon music, and I quickly joined the Murderino family.
Once their short, acoustic introduction plays, Karen Kilgarrif and Georgia Hardstark introduce themselves, and they welcome you. They refer to their loyal listeners as Murderinos as they clearly have a passion for the graphic, hidden and mysterious murder cases, disasters that have happened due to nature, such as volcanic eruptions, and everything your little true crime heart desires.
Hardstark and Kilgarrif then discuss what’s going on in the world for a minute. They share their opinions and thoughts on all the fuckery going on in the world. TV shows that they’re currently watching are discussed and/or recommended. Books are also a topic that they cover since they are avid readers themselves. Everything from self-help books to sci-fi has been recommended, so there’s a huge variety and something for everyone. Personally, I enjoy some of the sci-fi books that are about the world having such a disaster, humanity has to start all over in a different way. It’s deeply fascinating. No story is scarier than thinking about a world without wifi and central heating/cooling.
The show then turns to the stuff we all came for; the murder stories. This lovely duo will then each present whichever murder/unsolved case/missing persons/cold cases, etc. they have chosen to talk about. For example, did you know that brown paint used to be made with mummified flesh? Apparently the flesh would make a very specific shade of brown that painters were very fond of, until they found out where it came from. The mysterious disappearance of Amelia Earnheart was assessed as far as what happened, and what people have come up with as far as theories go as to what truly happened to the female pilot and what led to her demise that still remains unanswered to this day. The duo even talked about a story that happened, a missing persons case on two teens that went missing back in the 50s, in my own hometown, Au Sable, Michigan, and that really caught my attention. Especially since I live in one of those seasonal towns that is extremely small and nothing interesting seems to ever happen around here. Once I discovered that episode I posted it on Facebook so everyone else in my town could listen to it, because even though we all mostly know the story, the lead Murderinos go into more detail and talk about parts of the case that I didn't even know.
I feel like I can speak for a lot of people when I say that when you can relate to someone or something on a personal level, it holds your attention more and draws you in. I was at work one day and wanted something to listen to on my air pods. I Googled “best podcasts” and My Favorite Murder was in the top 10. Naturally, instead of reading the reviews on any of them, I went based on name, so MFM won, and I do not regret my decision. I listened to one episode, thinking I was going to get bored just listening to people talk, almost like an audio book or something, but it was not like that at all. Now that I think about how I could ever assume that about such an amazing podcast makes me want to bite my own tongue for thinking such blasphemy.
Ironically, having the ability to relate to someone in a level that other people just don’t understand, like a burning passion of a thousand suns for true crime, is how Kilgarrif and Hardstark met. They were at a Halloween party in Los Angeles in 2015, and Georgia was talking about a horrific and fatal car accident she had witnessed on the highway at some point. Everyone seemed to be grossed out by the details and uncomfortable, but that’s exactly what drew Karen to her now co-host and dear friend. She immediately went up to Georgia and said that she needed to know every detail at that very moment, and the rest is history. They have been killing it ever since.
Karen and Georgia released their first podcast episode in January 2016 on the Feral Audio network. Then in June 2016, Steven Ray Morris joined them as their producer. However, in 2017, Feral Audio was shut down, due to scandalous sexual abuse alligations made against the founder, Feral Audio was no more. That’s when the ladies joined the Midroll Media network, until they founded their own network, on November 18, 2018, Exactly Right network. One of Karen’s cute and quirky phrases is “that’s exactly right” so it’s no surprise that they gave their network a name that they have sentimental value with.
January 2022 is when Amazon and Wonderly Plus acquired the rights to MFM and part of the deal is that Exactly Right network will drop episodes one week early, before other networks. As an Amazon member, this makes me inappropriately pumped up for Mondays and Thursdays, as those are the releases of their episodes.
My Favorite Murder drops two different types of episodes. Full episodes that drop on Thursdays are generally from 60 minutes to 120 minutes, whereas mini episodes that drop on Mondays are only 30-45 minutes. Kilgarrif and Hardstark are humble women, and even have a portion of their show dedicated to what is called corrections corner, where they correct themselves from previous shows if they had gotten fan feedback that they had mispronounced a name or place, if they got a fact wrong, or if they have follow up thoughts to throw out there that weren’t talked about previously, but only for a brief moment. The show is guaranteed fresh material each episode, but as we know, we are all human and mistakes can be made, and they work hard to make sure that they get their facts straight. That is admirable in the sense that admitting your wrong can be hard in any aspect, but they truly love what they do, and they deal with the good and bad parts of this line of work with strength, courage, and of course, being independent women and putting their voices out there to be heard on what they believe in and work for each and every day. And of course we can’t forget about hometown murders. This is a portion of the show where Kilgarrif and Hardstark go over emails received from fans about murders/true crimes/involvement with true crime or horrible things that have happened to them. Some of the stories are incredible. Just when you think the world can’t feel any smaller, you hear a story about how someone found out they’re related to an infamous murderer or someone who is related to a missing person remains a cold case. It really is incredible to hear people share such personal stories and it’s enjoyable hearing them.
Speaking of personal, Kilgarrif and Hardstark also wrote a dual memoir together, Stay Sexy and Don’t Get Murdered. If you’re like me and had to know everything about them the second I fell in love with their show, then you know what I’m talking about. This book talks about where the girls each came from, and what kind of households they grew up in. it includes stories from their younger years, about moments that made them realize sometimes you have to just say “fuck politeness” and keep going without feeling guilty, based on what someone else was trying to force them to do. They voice their beliefs that women do not have to give in to advances from men, especially if the feeling isn’t mutual, and you do not need to feel bad for that. Personal stories of moments just like that are among these pages as well. It is fulfilling to know that there are other women out there that have experienced what most, if not all, women have gone through at one point in their life. Struggles with drugs are brought to light and so much more. I ordered my copy off Amazon, and you can get yours there too!

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